Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Those Days

Do you ever have one of those days?  You know, the kind where you feel like you are never going to get there.  The days where you feel defeated before you even begin?  I will admit, they are rare for this eternal optimist, but sometimes they hit me square on the head.  Those days, I just feel defeated.

I know that I am not defeated.  I know that as God grants sunrises, my days are full of endless opportunity.  But, they don't always feel that way.  Some days are hard.  Some moments in life are swift kicks in the rump.  They hurt and they seem pointless.  I think to myself, what is the point of working so hard on something so unattainable?  Why keep writing?  Why keep singing?  Why keep asking others to take a chance on me?  Is there a point?  What is the point?

I don't want to get stuck.  I don't want to regret not trying.  I don't want to be gray and weary from being held prisoner by the life at hand that tries to capture my energy and soul.  I don't want to give up.  I want to feel like I have done something meaningful with my time on Planet Earth.  I want to think I did all I could to use the gifts that God gave me. 

But some days....I feel like I am singing in a hole, writing to a wall, and dreaming for nothing.  Like...it isn't any use. 

It's silly. It's bad personal philosophy.  But...it happens.

Hopefully, tomorrow is not another one of those days. 


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